We’ve had two weeks straight of propaganda from people most of us don’t know about a preacher who’s coming most of us have never met, and folks are asking me “what gives?”

Our elders requested those articles be printed up, and since they be the actual editors in chief around here I happily obliged them. Made myself a tad nervous though. The way I see it, Ed Harrell is going to be either really good (thus so many are saying such things about him it just spills out) or really bad (thus the elders are trying to hype him up before he gets here, and the good reports are from people we don’t know because that’s the only ones they could find!). Since the latter is unlikely, I think I am on somewhat safe ground to make the following observations.

First off, we have had some spectacular speakers come to our little congregation and hold meetings. They were interesting, compelling, and the time flew by. Speaking of time, some were of a great time – long enough to really get the max enjoyment, but not so long that your backside started to hurt and the message was tainted with thoughts of “hurry up preacher man, you’ve said enough already for two lessons!” Often they walked around the podium or even in front of it, and learned many of our names which they dropped in the course of the sermon to make the examples more “lively”. Handcuffing Mo was also a good example of cheap, theatrical tricks that really get a sound point across.

Unfortunately we’ve had some duds, too. Men who were too full of themselves, who gave a plain spoken hick like me the snooty “down the nose” attitude because of the way I dress or present myself, likely as an “ig-nore-ant” fellow. Some talk and talk and talk way too long. Some namedrop other preachers, or an institution I myself am not so warm and fuzzy about, as if this gave them some additional authority or importance. Once in a while they might be a guy who has that monotone, zzzzzzzz voice that right away you think “oh no, we’ve got 5 more sermons after this one to stay awake through!” And my most passionate dislike of all, once in while we get a speaker who tries to enhance the bible story – not just to exaggerate to make some point but as if they are somehow “in the know” and we unwashed folks should count ourselves lucky they have come along to expound on things they have learned. As if they have some inside information that they hint to us in crumbs. I recall one speaker adamantly saying Jesus was well known as the best carpenter in all of Judea, and somehow tying that into the scriptures – and refusing to cast even one iota of doubt upon this “fact” that I was simply not privy to in their higher learning when I questioned him on it later. Yikes.

There is this realistic side of things, certainly. The speaker can make or break the meeting. But we as listeners can help the wheels fall off the wagon just as easily, no matter how good the preaching is! Just imagine things from his point of view. “Those folks came Sunday morning, rushed out, and I never saw half of them again.” Or how about, “Those kids must have some kind of infection, they were walking out and back and out and back to the restroom the whole time.” Or maybe, “I was blinded by all the tops of the bald heads that bobbed up and down.” What about, “I was brought back to my days in the service – all those crying babies reminded me of air raid sirens!” Finally, how about, “Those must be the most scholarly people I have ever met. They spent the whole time reading books, magazines, the bulletin… (or texting, or whatever!)”

Or maybe ol’ Ed will come and be a dynamic speaker, and we’ll be the bright eyed, very attentive, wiz-bang crowd he’s expecting and everyone will be so very glad we met him and have such a good experience we’re pumped with zeal and new determination.

Yeah, I’m going for that myself! Make up your mind to be here, too! See you then!