There are many, many things in life I simply don't understand. and never will. Clothing. Manners. Girls. Why people expect God to accept their wacky worship.

My wife tells me I can't wear orange shorts with my red shirt. I can wear red shorts with a red shirt (apparently this is borderline), but not orange. Is she biased against orange? No, if I wear a blue shirt I can combine it with those orange shorts and she will allow herself to be seen with me in public. But never purple with orange. I think.

I was once taught when you put a bunch of non-similar things together it's OK. Going back to the clothes analogy, it's wrong to wear my bright colors when I attend a black tie occasion, where everyone is wearing black or white. Apparently you are not supposed to stand out. If everyone is wearing outlandish stuff, though, you fit right in. So even though you are different, you are the same. I think.

I also hear tell that there is a "Union Congregational Church" in a town nearby. This means, as it was explained to me, that "all beliefs are welcome" and the group is mostly made up of Baptists, Lutherans, and something that slips my mind but they are "unified" in some way. I am guessing they are unified that each one is not real happy with the other two, but with church attendance getting smaller and smaller they put up with this in order to fill the pews. So in their case, union doesn't mean united, it just means tolerant until more members show up. I think.

I have a business card from a church in Colorado that boasts "Looking for something new? You are invited! Music - Video Games. Live Drama and Refreshments!" I don't quite get how that relates to "One Way Youth with a Purpose!" but that's the slogan they use to bring them in. Maybe the X-Box has something to do with the cross, or the ends are supposed to justify the means. I think.

I have a church bulletin (not one of ours!) that has advertisements for donuts, medical supplies, flooring, fish food, a bank, tree services, auto body, real estate, travel, landscaping, accounting, a funeral home, and a liquor store. Somehow this doesn't conflict with that passage about being "unequally yoked together", because all these are on the back page, and the "good stuff' is all on the front. I think.

A church near Mo had a special blessing service, where members were encouraged to bring in their pets to services. Dogs, cats, guinea pigs, and hamsters were among those attending. (Does this mean my own dogs are heathens and condemned?) I'm not sure what blessing I would ask God to lay on a hamster, but Tiny Tim said "God bless us every one" and he must have meant all creatures, too. I think.

Now, I suppose you believe I'm exaggerating about these above items, but I'm not. The next time you come over to my house, and you have all been invited at one time or another, you just ask me and I will produce the documentation for each. This is kinda what I don't quite grasp: How did folks stray so far from the truth, and why do they stay there? I guess as long as everyone is doing their own thing, then they are all doing the same thing. No one stands out, no one is made to feel different or uncomfortable. They can all be lost together. Oh boy!

Or I reckon it this way - being a true follower of God never goes out of style- with God. And perfect for every occasion. It's nice that each piece of the armor of God seems to have Garanimals on it!

Randy